CSI: Underwater

June 13, 2006 - By Jeff Barnard, Associated Press

ASHLAND, Ore. - When death strikes a coral reef, whether from an oil spill off Mexico or sediment unleashed by a dam bursting in Hawaii, marine biologists know what to look for, but not how to document and preserve their findings so they will hold up in court.

Now biologists and criminalists from around the world are joining forces to develop crime-scene investigation techniques that work under water.

The "CSI"-type standards will govern such things as how to take notes under the sea, how to mark off the crime scene, how to photograph it, and how to preserve the "chain of custody" so that defense attorneys cannot argue that evidence was tampered with.

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One of these days, hopefully while I am still alive, whales and other marine life will evolve into humans, and punish us for our transgressions against their habitats.

If that does happen, I'll save them the hassle and just shoot myself.

Like a Samurai.